Observing Communication

A Chinese American boy named Kevin was in my class two years ago, when he was five. He was sweet and soft. Sometimes he could be annoying, as he did not want to do any work in the class, but to chat with me. I talked to his mom, and his mom did not seem to care about what happened to hime that much. She told me that they had the tutor at home for the boy, and she believed the boys are meant to be tough even when they are young. I could tell that Kevin wanted to be hugged and cared, but he did not seem to get it from mom. Obviously, dad was too busy with the work to take care of him. Two years later, this year, I heard that Kevin’s mom died, and everyone worried about Kevin. However, I overheard the conversation between the P.E. teacher and Kevin, which made me really sad.

I was walking past the gym, and the P.E. teacher was taking Kevin’s class back to the classroom. Obviously, Kevin was not behaving well in P.E. class, so the teacher was telling Kevin that if he did not behave in P.E. class, he will talk to his mom. Kevin looked at him, talking back to the teacher straight aways: “ No, you cannot, because my mom died!”. I could tell the P.E. teacher was shocked, and did not know what to say to Kevin. He saw me, and whispered to me to confirm if it is true that Kevin’s mom died. I nodded. From that conversation I knew that the P.E. teacher was not informed of the death of Kevin’s mom, and Kevin has realized the truth of his mom’s death. When he told the teacher that, I did not see any special facial expressions from Kevin. He seemed to be really calm and quite. He seemed to state a truth that has nothing to do with himself. I felt really sad and sorry for Kevin. I went up to Kevin, stroking his hair, and smiled to him. Kevin saw me, and he started to smile and gave me a hug. I did not what to say to him, and I just wanted to ensure that he could feel there is still someone there to help and support him.

I believed that situation could be totally avoided. Teachers are supposed to keep each other informed of the children’s situations. The classroom teacher has the responsibility to communicate to the other teachers who work with the child to let them know what happened. In that case, the teachers will know what they can say, and what they should try to avoid. I think collaboration is also about keeping everyone on the same page to make the communication with children more effectively. Meanwhile, I remember he liked to chat with me a lot, and I kind of know why now. Kevin does feel that he is invisible to others. His mom did whatever she considered to be good for Kevin without spending time communicating with Kevin. Dad never has time to talk to Kevin. Kevin is taken care of by mom, maids and drivers at home. As it was stated in the media segment, children need to feel respected and accepted for who they are, and heard (Laureate Education, Inc.2010). He wants people to know his existence. He made that statement probably because he did not want people to still think he is invisible. He made a strong statement to prove his existence and to draw people’s attention. I do not know why Kevin’s dad tried to hide the fact of the death from Kevin as long as he could, and he wanted the school to keep it as a secret. I think the best way for Kevin is to help him face the truth and give him more attention and therapy to support him to walk out of the sadness. I do believe Kevin’s dad needs to be more collaborative with school to build the trustful relationship with teachers and the school to serve Kevin better. With the collaboration among teachers, and the trustful relationship between the school and the family, the communication with Kevin will be more effective than it was, and Kevin can have more support from teachers and the family. Meanwhile, both teachers and the family need to acknowledge the existence of Kevin to make his voice heard.

The communication interactions that I observed will definitely affect the child’s feelings. Kevin would feel hurt because people did not acknowledge the death of his mom. He would feel not respected and valued in school. Meanwhile, he would feel no one cares about him, because no one knows what is going on in his life. He would feel being neglected by both his family and the teachers. He will be in hope of love and care from people to make him feel he is still loved.

What I have learned in this week is plentiful. The observation that I had this week reminds me of the moments that I was dominating the conversations without listening to children. I realize that adults are easily dominating the conversations, and we are supposed to step back to listen to children’s voices and ideas. We need to put our agenda aside (Stephenson, 2010). Children will surprise us with their creative ideas and responses. I should say I used to do it a lot to dominate the conversations to lead the children to the paths that I designed for them. I should be more open to their ideas and creativities. Meanwhile, I also learned that we should encourage children to speak up to share their thinking, and use their own ideas to solve problems in the classroom ( Pierson & Johnson, 2010). The last but not the least is about the communication among the adults who work and live with children. Colleagues at school and parent at home are meant to work together to build up a positive partnership to serve children better. We need to keep everyone on the same page, as we all want the best for children.

References

Laureate Education, Inc. (Producer). (2010). “Communicating with Young Children” (Video webcast). Retrieved at https://class.waldenu.edu/webapps/portal/frameset.jsp?tab_tab_group_id=_2_1&url=%2Fwebapps%2Fblackboard%2Fexecute%2Flauncher%3Ftype%3DCourse%26id%3D_2652530_1%26url%3D

Stephenson, A. (2009). Conversations with a 2-year-old. YC: Young Children, 64(2), 90-95. Retrieved from the Walden Library using the Education Research Complete database. http://ezp.waldenulibrary.org/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=ehh&AN=37131016&site=ehost-live&scope=site

Pierce, J., & Johnson, C. (2010). Problem solving with young children using persona dolls. YC: Young Children, 65(6), 106-108.

Seeing the diversity in the environment

To respect and support diversity in the program, the environment should provide the opportunities for children to see themselves and the materials that honor diversity both within and beyond their own identity groups ( Derman-Sparks & Olsen Edward, 2010). If I am going to open my own Family Child Care Home, I think I would like my setting to be child and family friendly, and to represent the children and their families that I currently serve as my first concern.

In the media segment, Adriana (2010) stated that she believes it is important to greet everyone in the morning, and I believe so too. I will post the good morning sign with various home languages that my children speak on the door, and I will try to learn them as well. In that case, I can greet to the families in the morning in their home languages to make children proud of their home language and feel respected and valued. Meanwhile, the photos, posters, dolls and dresses should be of great variety to demonstrate the diversity in and beyond the classroom. I will have a drama corner, so we can discuss the differences and conflicts in the class with the usage of the dolls. Meanwhile, I will create my own playlist of the music that includes the music from children’s own home cultures (Derman-Sparks & Olsen Edward, 2010). Besides that, in the reading corner, the books should be the tools that children can read and learn how to express themselves, to communicate with others, and to discuss their emotions. Teachers have the responsibility to choose the books that can introduce children to the love of reading as well as to human differences and similarities, or help children become critical thinkers (Derman-Sparks & Olsen Edward, 2010). I really liked the family corner in the media segment. Each family brings something about their home culture to share with the rest of the class. I will have one corner like that as well in the class. It can be the photos, decorations, toys, or dresses. Anything that families decide to bring to represent their own cultures. Doing that can help children learn about their own home cultures and learn about other cultures in the world. I would like to invite the parents and the children together to give a small speech or presentation of what they bring to school. I want children to be proud of who they are. One of the major parts of the early years setting is the toys. Dramatic play props, puzzles, drawing material and blocks and legos are the toys that children love to play with. As teachers, we are supposed to ensure the pieces of the toys can reflect the diversity of the cultures, especially the home cultures of the children that we currently serve. Above all is the primary elements that I would like to include in my setting, as I really want children to develop views of the bigger world (Derman-Sparks & Olsen Edward, 2010).

References

Derman-Sparks, L., & Olsen Edwards, J. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and ourselves. Washington, D.C.: National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC).

The Final Post of This Course

The hope that I have is to have more channels for the families from various cultural backgrounds to be understood and expressed in the school community.

The goal that I have is to implement diversity into the curriculum to eliminate the stereotypes and biases in children’s lives.

I have learned a lot from the colleagues help and support. I enjoyed the posts of their personal stories and experiences. Thank you everyone for reading and responding to my stories and posts too. I had a great and supportive eight weeks. I hope we can work together again soon. Thank you all.